The Happiness Within

If you were me, then you would know.
You'd be feeling trapped; Nowhere to go
I'm in a room full of people. But sitting alone.
Paranoid they're talking about me, I'm still as a stone.
I'm looking at my notebook. Not left or right.
Wishing, and hoping I'll disappear out of sight.
I ask to use the bathroom, and walk into the hall.
Wanting, so badly, to knock down a wall.
All those people leaving me grieving, and without hope.
There's nothing wrong with me, I think I just don't know how to cope.
I get into the stall, no tears running down my face.
So I pull out the blade from my pocket that I had, just in case
But remembering all those people leaving me, and hurting me.
My eyes get so blurry, I can't even see.
I'm so overwhelmed, I almost want to shout.
But I focus, not to let the tears come out.
I use the blade to scratch at my skin.
All because I couldn't find The Happiness Within.